Saturday, December 03, 2005
Chasing a Vision
Wed. May 9, Sunny +18 no winds today, but still no rain
Susan is well after the operation. I visited her this afternoon. She is a little unhappy about being drugged but I would assume that it is necessary after the procedure. She said that everything went better than expected. I would expect this to be statement made by the medical staff to quiet the patients' mind. It was nice to talk with her and see that she is well. I left some flowers and a card. Louise had come by earlier in the morning.
I was reminded Susan’s birthday is June 15 not May 15; I always seem to get the dates mixed up.
Mother was in a good mood at lunch so we had a spirited discussion about life. She was on her way to purchase a pair of running shoes.
I am still fighting this cold and should have taken some medication to get rid of these sniffles.
I am looking forward to John and my appointment with this new client on Thursday although I am not getting too anxious about a possible sale.
Mother suggested that Cheryl might like to take up golf. With my schedule I might be able to spend some time with her and golf during the mornings. I have to encourage Cheryl to take some lessons or at the least go down to the driving range for some practice.
Saturday, May 12, Sunny and clear +24, turned windy in the afternoon
The week went by slowly.
I checked out another furniture store to see what they offered.
I visited Susan at the hospital; she was fine and was to be released in the afternoon. No one was around to drive her home, so I helped her with all her flowers and cards, settled her into her home and made sure she was comfortable. Because of the medication Susan is still on, she is quite funny.
John arrived at the show home around 6.30, we chatted till 7.00 when our client arrived for the appointment. We spent an hour going over the home she wanted. We found one that would suit her if we made a few changes. She would be happy with the basement finished, a different color in the family room and more room for her shoes in the master closet. She feels comfortable building on a lot in the west end of the development by the golf course. Her ex husband has some influence with the land developer and might be able to get her a better price on the lot. She will be confirming the lot price, visiting her bank for a small mortgage guarantee on Friday. John will revise the costs and fax over a final "best price" on Friday for her confirmation. She will get back to us over the weekend or at the latest on Monday. She is aware of the time frame, and will let us know quickly so we can get started on this home.
I am trying to remain quiet and calm about this negotiation. It is not necessary, financially, for me to get this sale. It would be nice to be successful in terms of being able to offer her the home and terms that she envisions.
My ego and self, although not tied to this transaction would sustain a boost, considering the turmoil that is happening with Susan because of her to decision to check out a new life style. I will have to be careful to remain consistent in response to her emotional and physiological moods swings as she tries to accomplish what she has started. I will have to look out for myself once again to be able to continue with my life and not create any resentment within myself.
Sheila's birthday /new job party is tonight and I am quite looking forward to the evening. I expect that I am focusing on her as a female and friend to move myself away from the loss of closeness with Susan. I hope that I am not a pest in recreating a friendship with her, though we have been getting together very well over the past year. She has used this friendship to share her fears about the upcoming major change in her life. She is moving to Toronto for her Fellowship in August which would make any relationship between us quite short lived. Perhaps we both need a friendship on a short term basis. The other possibility is we are just needy.
Anyway, I will stay busy with some flying on a regular basis, regardless of the money. Golfing in the early morning will take up some time. I should take a trip south and go golfing on Friday.
Cheryl has settled down a little although her male friend at work continues to provide enough distraction to keep her energy focused.
Lil called to talk about her son’s wedding plans that are progressing nicely. She asked again if I would be coming to the wedding. It is nice to be asked.
Samantha is growing up quickly without any medical concerns. Jonathon is having problems accepting the responsibility of being a father. This is not a surprise, given his immature behavior up to this point. It is sad that his parents denied him the joy of making decisions on his own. That to me, is such a waste.
I was able to work on a business plan for myself.
John faxed the information to our client on Friday but as yet has heard nothing back.
Sunday, May 13, Sunny, some wind +23
Mother's day is quite lovely. Mom is in good spirits with enough people calling her today.
The party at Sheila's was warm and welcoming. Her thoughts and fears that no one would show up to be with her in the evening were unfounded as we all knew. A great crowd of her many faceted friends gathered during the evening to share the special occasion. I reacquainted myself with some people I had not seen for a long time. Most of the people at the party were quite fascinating although I did not have the chance to talk with everyone. With my thoughts to Sheila’s future in the East I was pleasantly surprised to meet and be enchanted by a stunning woman who has been a life long friend of Sheila's.
To my amusement I cannot remember much about her, although we were introduced. Today my thoughts are on her and our discussions during the evening. I have no real knowledge on her status, relationship wise. She made sure that we spent time talking, exchanging stories and thoughts.
No partner or children, an educated (PHD) profession woman working at the University of Alberta in the domain of birds and their environment are a few things I do remember. There is obviously a complicated word describing what she does, she told me what it was, but I have forgotten. A good conversationalist, who listened well, put forward interesting questions and was not put off when I asked about personal questions about her joy of working in her chosen field. I will follow this up sometime later in the week to find out whether she would like to share some time together. Sheila said that her friend is away to the south of the province because of her work. Interesting how these things work out.
I chatted with Peter briefly on the phone about a programming problem.
He said that Hector on his third meeting with the new female in his life, expressed his desire that they become an item. She was quite startled to the point that she told Hector he was really a "nice" fellow but she was not ready for a committed relationship. Peter said that Hector was quite devastated by this announcement. The probability that Hector will be set back emotionally because of this event is very high. If we get together next Thursday I will have to talk to him about his expectations. Does he want a partner to take care of him and his children or does he want someone in his life to share the day to day events? I am quite sure that he is not clear about what he actually desires.
Cheryl and Ken called to arrange a golf time with them east of the city.
Susan called to chat. She is doing well with her recovery and is adjusting to her time off.
I tried to remain quite unemotional and distant. She continues to struggle but is strong in her commitment to focus in on herself.
Monday, May 14, cloudy all day, with hints of a drizzle,+14, it is trying but the possibility of rain is small
The framers are at work next door on the first home I sold. I took some more photos to catalogue the progress.
Spent the morning doing laundry, washed floors and generally cleaned up the apartment. I managed to break the toilet hinge in my vigorous cleaning. I should get the paint and do the bathroom.
Gas is up over 72 cents at most of the stations in town. A few of the outlets are selling at 69 cents. Our client called John today and said she would go ahead with the new home. She has put a lot on hold and will pick up a copy of the agreement this evening. She will meet with John tomorrow if she is ok with the information. Sounds like a go on this sale.
I have set up a flow chart to be able to track the traffic we have at the show home.
I called Sheila last evening to thank her for the party and to gather further information on the bird lady. It turns out her name is Susan. I am turning into another Jim with his Cathy's.
I explained to Sheila that I was interested and would like more information on her situation. She has been divorced for about two years, a 12 year old child that she shares custody with her ex who also works at the U of A. Susan has a PHD in the study of birds and animals as they are related to the environment. Sheila said that Susan threw herself into her work after the marriage of about 16 years came to an end. She is not really looking but would not comment any further.
Sheila is a little hurt and disappointed in my interest in Susan but was resolved to my interest in her friend Susan. Sheila's statement was "do not forget about me" when you are involved with Susan. Sheila will pass on my interest and phone number to Susan and let her contact me if she has an interest. Susan is out of the city till the end of the week.
I have a great many feelings stirring within me. The ones I have for Sheila- we are friends without any possibility of any other type of commitment. We tried it once, it did not work. She is off to Toronto in the fall for a year. I am aware that Susan and she are close friends and there are many dynamics at play.
Getting to know a new person with all the possible outcomes is somewhat intimidating. I enjoyed the time I spent with her it may have been the party atmosphere, the wine or the need to talk to a woman. Perhaps it is just the fact that a female found me interesting. This time of transition for me, with Susan chasing her ghosts is unsettling to say the least.
Dana called last night to check up on me. The industry still has not ramped up so he has had no work. He is doing all the necessary steps to get work in the industry or alternately as a car washer or dish washer. He spent some time Sunday taking photographs with a girlfriend of his. He expressed an interest in the optional camera lens that I had available in my kit bag. I told him that the camera I possessed was a Canon; he had a Nikon so the lens would not be compatible. On second thought I will check out my photo bag. Some of the connections I have are generic and may make the connections to his unit. I will send what I can to him so he can continue playing with his camera. It might lead somewhere.
Warren called and suggested that we play squash in the evening after work. I am not on the cold pills at the moment so it will be interesting to find out how much energy I have in the games.
Susan is well after the operation. I visited her this afternoon. She is a little unhappy about being drugged but I would assume that it is necessary after the procedure. She said that everything went better than expected. I would expect this to be statement made by the medical staff to quiet the patients' mind. It was nice to talk with her and see that she is well. I left some flowers and a card. Louise had come by earlier in the morning.
I was reminded Susan’s birthday is June 15 not May 15; I always seem to get the dates mixed up.
Mother was in a good mood at lunch so we had a spirited discussion about life. She was on her way to purchase a pair of running shoes.
I am still fighting this cold and should have taken some medication to get rid of these sniffles.
I am looking forward to John and my appointment with this new client on Thursday although I am not getting too anxious about a possible sale.
Mother suggested that Cheryl might like to take up golf. With my schedule I might be able to spend some time with her and golf during the mornings. I have to encourage Cheryl to take some lessons or at the least go down to the driving range for some practice.
Saturday, May 12, Sunny and clear +24, turned windy in the afternoon
The week went by slowly.
I checked out another furniture store to see what they offered.
I visited Susan at the hospital; she was fine and was to be released in the afternoon. No one was around to drive her home, so I helped her with all her flowers and cards, settled her into her home and made sure she was comfortable. Because of the medication Susan is still on, she is quite funny.
John arrived at the show home around 6.30, we chatted till 7.00 when our client arrived for the appointment. We spent an hour going over the home she wanted. We found one that would suit her if we made a few changes. She would be happy with the basement finished, a different color in the family room and more room for her shoes in the master closet. She feels comfortable building on a lot in the west end of the development by the golf course. Her ex husband has some influence with the land developer and might be able to get her a better price on the lot. She will be confirming the lot price, visiting her bank for a small mortgage guarantee on Friday. John will revise the costs and fax over a final "best price" on Friday for her confirmation. She will get back to us over the weekend or at the latest on Monday. She is aware of the time frame, and will let us know quickly so we can get started on this home.
I am trying to remain quiet and calm about this negotiation. It is not necessary, financially, for me to get this sale. It would be nice to be successful in terms of being able to offer her the home and terms that she envisions.
My ego and self, although not tied to this transaction would sustain a boost, considering the turmoil that is happening with Susan because of her to decision to check out a new life style. I will have to be careful to remain consistent in response to her emotional and physiological moods swings as she tries to accomplish what she has started. I will have to look out for myself once again to be able to continue with my life and not create any resentment within myself.
Sheila's birthday /new job party is tonight and I am quite looking forward to the evening. I expect that I am focusing on her as a female and friend to move myself away from the loss of closeness with Susan. I hope that I am not a pest in recreating a friendship with her, though we have been getting together very well over the past year. She has used this friendship to share her fears about the upcoming major change in her life. She is moving to Toronto for her Fellowship in August which would make any relationship between us quite short lived. Perhaps we both need a friendship on a short term basis. The other possibility is we are just needy.
Anyway, I will stay busy with some flying on a regular basis, regardless of the money. Golfing in the early morning will take up some time. I should take a trip south and go golfing on Friday.
Cheryl has settled down a little although her male friend at work continues to provide enough distraction to keep her energy focused.
Lil called to talk about her son’s wedding plans that are progressing nicely. She asked again if I would be coming to the wedding. It is nice to be asked.
Samantha is growing up quickly without any medical concerns. Jonathon is having problems accepting the responsibility of being a father. This is not a surprise, given his immature behavior up to this point. It is sad that his parents denied him the joy of making decisions on his own. That to me, is such a waste.
I was able to work on a business plan for myself.
John faxed the information to our client on Friday but as yet has heard nothing back.
Sunday, May 13, Sunny, some wind +23
Mother's day is quite lovely. Mom is in good spirits with enough people calling her today.
The party at Sheila's was warm and welcoming. Her thoughts and fears that no one would show up to be with her in the evening were unfounded as we all knew. A great crowd of her many faceted friends gathered during the evening to share the special occasion. I reacquainted myself with some people I had not seen for a long time. Most of the people at the party were quite fascinating although I did not have the chance to talk with everyone. With my thoughts to Sheila’s future in the East I was pleasantly surprised to meet and be enchanted by a stunning woman who has been a life long friend of Sheila's.
To my amusement I cannot remember much about her, although we were introduced. Today my thoughts are on her and our discussions during the evening. I have no real knowledge on her status, relationship wise. She made sure that we spent time talking, exchanging stories and thoughts.
No partner or children, an educated (PHD) profession woman working at the University of Alberta in the domain of birds and their environment are a few things I do remember. There is obviously a complicated word describing what she does, she told me what it was, but I have forgotten. A good conversationalist, who listened well, put forward interesting questions and was not put off when I asked about personal questions about her joy of working in her chosen field. I will follow this up sometime later in the week to find out whether she would like to share some time together. Sheila said that her friend is away to the south of the province because of her work. Interesting how these things work out.
I chatted with Peter briefly on the phone about a programming problem.
He said that Hector on his third meeting with the new female in his life, expressed his desire that they become an item. She was quite startled to the point that she told Hector he was really a "nice" fellow but she was not ready for a committed relationship. Peter said that Hector was quite devastated by this announcement. The probability that Hector will be set back emotionally because of this event is very high. If we get together next Thursday I will have to talk to him about his expectations. Does he want a partner to take care of him and his children or does he want someone in his life to share the day to day events? I am quite sure that he is not clear about what he actually desires.
Cheryl and Ken called to arrange a golf time with them east of the city.
Susan called to chat. She is doing well with her recovery and is adjusting to her time off.
I tried to remain quite unemotional and distant. She continues to struggle but is strong in her commitment to focus in on herself.
Monday, May 14, cloudy all day, with hints of a drizzle,+14, it is trying but the possibility of rain is small
The framers are at work next door on the first home I sold. I took some more photos to catalogue the progress.
Spent the morning doing laundry, washed floors and generally cleaned up the apartment. I managed to break the toilet hinge in my vigorous cleaning. I should get the paint and do the bathroom.
Gas is up over 72 cents at most of the stations in town. A few of the outlets are selling at 69 cents. Our client called John today and said she would go ahead with the new home. She has put a lot on hold and will pick up a copy of the agreement this evening. She will meet with John tomorrow if she is ok with the information. Sounds like a go on this sale.
I have set up a flow chart to be able to track the traffic we have at the show home.
I called Sheila last evening to thank her for the party and to gather further information on the bird lady. It turns out her name is Susan. I am turning into another Jim with his Cathy's.
I explained to Sheila that I was interested and would like more information on her situation. She has been divorced for about two years, a 12 year old child that she shares custody with her ex who also works at the U of A. Susan has a PHD in the study of birds and animals as they are related to the environment. Sheila said that Susan threw herself into her work after the marriage of about 16 years came to an end. She is not really looking but would not comment any further.
Sheila is a little hurt and disappointed in my interest in Susan but was resolved to my interest in her friend Susan. Sheila's statement was "do not forget about me" when you are involved with Susan. Sheila will pass on my interest and phone number to Susan and let her contact me if she has an interest. Susan is out of the city till the end of the week.
I have a great many feelings stirring within me. The ones I have for Sheila- we are friends without any possibility of any other type of commitment. We tried it once, it did not work. She is off to Toronto in the fall for a year. I am aware that Susan and she are close friends and there are many dynamics at play.
Getting to know a new person with all the possible outcomes is somewhat intimidating. I enjoyed the time I spent with her it may have been the party atmosphere, the wine or the need to talk to a woman. Perhaps it is just the fact that a female found me interesting. This time of transition for me, with Susan chasing her ghosts is unsettling to say the least.
Dana called last night to check up on me. The industry still has not ramped up so he has had no work. He is doing all the necessary steps to get work in the industry or alternately as a car washer or dish washer. He spent some time Sunday taking photographs with a girlfriend of his. He expressed an interest in the optional camera lens that I had available in my kit bag. I told him that the camera I possessed was a Canon; he had a Nikon so the lens would not be compatible. On second thought I will check out my photo bag. Some of the connections I have are generic and may make the connections to his unit. I will send what I can to him so he can continue playing with his camera. It might lead somewhere.
Warren called and suggested that we play squash in the evening after work. I am not on the cold pills at the moment so it will be interesting to find out how much energy I have in the games.
# posted by A Mens' Group @ 11:13 AM 
